What being the mom of boys has taught me

What being a mom of boys has taught me


What being the mom of boys has taught me

Being a mom of boys, has been unchartered territory for me. I have learned a lot about myself and the world since TheHeir was born 10 years ago and I must say since the birth of THESPARE the learning curve has become even steeper.  Most of the things I am learning are profound and deep, but there is a vast majority which is just simply interesting, funny, cringe-worthy and sometimes scary things about how my boys do things.

Some of these lessons I would have preferred NOT to learn, but allegedly as a grown woman, you are supposed to go through these things – this is what many African moms have told me with a knowing smile – I guess because . I do not agree – trust me I was doing just fine before this.
The love of boys for their mom

These are the strangest and funniest lessons I have learned from being the mom of boys

    1. My first lesson is, In my experience, childbirth is a horrifically painful experience, and no you don’t forget the pain, thank you very much. It is a pity that the boys will never actually know what I had to go through to bring them into the world. But as a loving mother, I will find ways to make sure they have at least a slight clue. This is my revenge.
    2. I learned that if there was ever a point in my life when I will lose all dignity, it will not be when I am dead and I am being cut open by strangers. No, that moment has already happened twice, it was a child birth. There is no dignity, no privacy, no running away from the vulnerability of being in that position, or having strangers look at your privates with a very detached but focused eye. You can’t even cover your face and pretend to be elsewhere, it turns out the doctors and nurses actually expect you to be present and take part while your body is being plundered. This is the reason while I never go back to the same doctors who helped me give birth, really we have crossed a line in the relationship that I can’t deal with.
    3. I learned that I love drugs, more than chocolate and more than my dream of one day owning a BMW convertible, which incidentally was shattered by having kids. Drugs helped me get through birth, through the first days of recovery, and through numerous headaches caused by my gorgeous sons.
    4. I learned that yes I can, and I have turned to into THAT MOM. You know the one who talks about her kids all the time because they are amazing and clever and interesting. Yes, I have become her and it’s a slippery slope from that point cause you can’t get your life back after that, or even you can never take off those rose coloured glasses with which you view your children
    5. I learned  that I can never own the sports car I have been working so hard towards attaining because I am now a MOM (sob, sob, and I am supposed to be responsible)
    6. I learned that boys are a completely different species from girls. They do come from Mars. Growing up in a household of girls, having boys was a massive mind shift they have no boundaries and they have boundless energy.
    7. On the issue of boundaries, I learned the hard way that until they are teenagers, you will never go to the toilet alone. This is very traumatic to me still
    8. I learned that there will never be such a thing as enough groceries in the house. Somehow the offsprings will eat all the food in the house, and look at you as if you didn’t buy enough. I am not sure where they store it.
    9. I have also learned to embrace being a “lazy Mom”, that it very exhausting to parent, and you should take every opportunity you can to rest, and rejuvenate because you are going to need it
    10. I have learned that online shopping is a blessing I must embrace, no one can throw a tantrum at a shop like a little boy
    11. I have learned to put away all my preconceived ideas, about what kind of a mom I will be. Also any notion of being a glamour mommy “poof” Gone, I do manual labour such cleaning up snot, because the TheSpare will not let anyone else clean it from him, if I am in the house, as I obviously am worthy of the honor, changing nappies, picking up clothes from the floors, and cleaning up spills
    12. Back to the issue of boundaries, somehow boys always find a way to sleep on you. They climb on you, cuddle you even when you don’t want to be and eventually just wear you down. Like an invading army
    13. I learned to let go of the belief that “Cleanliness is next to Godliness” and just go with “At Least I managed to catch them and bath them once today”. This is because, even though they might want to swim the whole day and night, but mention the word bath and somehow TheHeir remembers homework or runs away to play with his friends, or in the case, TheSpare – he just has a meltdown, and starts crying about how “Ake batle Tlapa” (I don’t want to Bath) – screaming at the top of his voice so the neighbors can come rescue him
    14. I learned to let go of the phrase “My kids will never be babysat by the TV. Someday’s that TV is the only thing standing between me and insanity
    15. I learned that all my worrying about how I was going to raise the boys was for nothing, little boys are like plants, enough food and sunshine seems to just grow them
    16. I learned there is so much heartbreak in store for you as the mom for every fall and scrape and broken arm, oh and the sprain to the ankle they will get, at the hospital parking lot, when they decide to jump out of the car, instead of climbing down properly, while going to have X-rays taken on the arm you suspect they broke 10 minutes ago
    17. I learned boys have a preference for a certain woman’s look, body build and voice from when they are very small … it is frightening and fascinating to watch
    18. I learned that I can let loose and have fun and scream and shout and dance and skip and my boys will think that’s the coolest thing I have ever done, and then ask me about food… Did I mention anything about the amount of food they consume?
    19. I learned that little boys love their mother completely, which translate to you being followed, cuddled at all randoms times, kissed and being told I love you mommy a hundred times a day. (Yes I have a hard life I know).

Great time at Gold Reef City #familyfun #lbloggers #mommyblogger #joziblogger #awellheeledwoman

A photo posted by ZA Lifestyle & Mommy Blog (@a_well_heeled_woman) on

As times goes by I am sure I will learn even more from the boys, and I look forward to it with an equal mixture of morbid fascination and real deep fear.

Are you a mommy to little men, what has parenting boys taught you, what are the funny/ scary things you have observed?

Share with me in the comments below.

Lindi Mogale Signature What being the mom of boys has taught me

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  • Reply Faye

    LOVE this! As a mom of three boys, I can totally relate. Especially to the drugs during childbirth (YES, PLEASE!), endless appetites, and ENERGY – oh, the energy!! It is a roller coaster ride, but I’m loving every minute of it.

    June 23, 2016 at 4:03 pm
    • Reply lindiwem

      hahahahah hey Faye yes its like they have extra battrey power

      July 1, 2016 at 3:21 pm
  • Reply Beth Giusti

    YES #19 for sure! I am a mom to 2 boys as well. Almost 3 and a 20 month old. There is no love like a love a boy has for his mom! I wouldn’t ever want to change that!
    Beth Giusti recently posted…Sesame Place & Residence Inn, LanghorneMy Profile

    June 23, 2016 at 6:39 pm
    • Reply lindiwem

      oh yes definitely they love you wholeheartedly

      July 1, 2016 at 3:21 pm
  • Reply Jessica Kirk

    I have two boys (and two girls) and yes, parenting boys is something else! There are even times my husband is flabbergasted and he looks at me like I’m supposed to know lol. I tell him, “You’re a boy! You should know!” lol. And yes childbirth was one of the most painful things I have ever done, and this last time I did it drug-free, but each time has truly been the most amazing experience and I love it!

    June 23, 2016 at 8:13 pm
    • Reply lindiwem

      my husband goes I dont know what that is all about lol and it makes me laugh

      July 1, 2016 at 3:20 pm
  • Reply MrsFF

    This had me rolling in laughter and nodding so many times I thought my head would be detached from the rest of my body. I only have a girl and so far the experiences are similar…

    June 23, 2016 at 10:00 pm
    • Reply lindiwem

      Hi dear, I am so glad it made you laugh being parents is very funny and we have no room for taking ourselves seriously

      July 1, 2016 at 3:20 pm
  • Reply Sue

    I have a son who is now 33 and a gorgeous two year old grandson who has stolen my heart. I loved reading your thoughts about motherhood and your two beautiful boys. We have great ideals about being a mother and then it happens and reality sets in. You all have such beautiful smiles which proves above all else you are happy. Sue from Sizzling Towards Sixty

    June 24, 2016 at 12:22 am
    • Reply lindiwem

      Hello Sue thank you so much for that. Yes motherhood never turns out the way we thought

      July 1, 2016 at 3:19 pm
  • Reply Silly Mummy

    Haha – how sweet! Yes, birth is very undignified! I gave up on no tv & being a glamorous mummy too! I only have girls though so no boy experience!

    June 24, 2016 at 1:05 am
    • Reply lindiwem

      So ia m not the only one that is good to know thank you for commenting love your blog

      July 1, 2016 at 3:15 pm
  • Reply Molly Stevens

    I love how you refer to your boys as TheHeir and TheSpare. Very funny. I raised a boy and now have two grandsons, so know the territory well. They are full of boundless energy, funny and know how to eat for sure! Your boys are adorable and it sounds like you have a wonderful relationship with them. 🙂
    Molly Stevens recently posted…Open the door to summertime!My Profile

    June 24, 2016 at 3:11 am
    • Reply lindiwem

      hahahaha they dont know yet that i call them that thank you so much Molly for reading my stories

      July 1, 2016 at 3:16 pm
  • Reply Terri Webster Schrandt

    Such great lessons that I can actually apply to being a single mom to two rambunctious daughters!

    June 24, 2016 at 4:54 pm
    • Reply lindiwem

      Yes terri isnt amazing how motherhood is unirvesal

      July 1, 2016 at 3:17 pm
  • Reply halfa1000miles

    Raising 3 boys also taught me how chill boys are with each other. It was so fascinating and foreign to me. They would regularly have conversations where they would ask a friend: I asked Tommy to go to camping with me, and he couldn’t, and then I asked Jerry and he couldn’t, so can you go?” And the kid would say “Sure” and would come and have a great time.

    Can you imagine girls basically saying: “Well, my first choice of friend couldn’t come, and then my second choice friend couldn’t come either, so now can you come?”

    Would never, ever have happened with my daughters 🙂 #waywow

    June 25, 2016 at 4:20 am
    • Reply lindiwem

      Yes that sounds so true of boys no worries as long as i have a friend

      July 1, 2016 at 3:18 pm
  • Reply Nikki Frank-Hamilton

    I love this! Childbirth is like nothing else in this world. And no, there is no dignity or privacy. In fact, privacy leaves when children are born! I have one of each, a boy and a girl. And they both are wonderful kids, but when my son was young he would scare me with his lack of boundaries or understanding that he could be hurt. He would climb everything. One day I ran when I heard him scream, he had climbed up onto the counter, then onto the top of the refrigerator and couldn’t get down! I think he was 3. There was no fear. At least he had no fear, he frightened me to death! I loved the cuddles, now that they are 16 and 23 I wish I would have had more!
    Nikki Frank-Hamilton recently posted…#WAYWOW #55 SUMMER IS SO CRAZY BUSY!My Profile

    June 29, 2016 at 5:14 am
  • Reply Sisiyemmie

    I only have one child, a boy! This is hilarious! I’m a starter but can identify with some of your points !

    July 12, 2016 at 10:45 am
    • Reply lindiwem

      oh mommy thats lovely, little boys are a blast. thanks for stopping by

      July 13, 2016 at 4:30 pm

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